One Last Chance
by Kate25
Summary: Carter and Abby try to spend a quiet weekend alone over the summer. Told in alternating Abby/Carter POV. Woohoo! Finally- chapters 11 and 12, the conclusion you've been waiting for!
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I don't own ER, or any of its characters. They are the property of NBC and Michael Crighton.

In this story, I've tried to present a happier side of some of the characters, at least to begin with. The story takes place in the summer, and begins with Carter and Abby going off to spend a quiet weekend alone- or so they think.

"Abby, do you have a minute?" my boyfriend, Dr. John Carter- or Carter, as almost everyone I know calls him- yelled.

         "Sure," I replied, puzzled. He didn't look like he was asking about a patient, and I didn't think we'd had a patient together yet this morning anyway. I followed him over to an empty exam room.

         "Are you on at all this weekend?" he asked.

         "Umm, not until Sunday afternoon, I don't think. Why?"

         "I was thinking maybe we could do something. My family has this cabin out by a little lake- I thought we could spend a weekend alone there."

         "Really?" I said flirtatiously. "And exactly how long have you been planning this 'spur-of-the-moment' weekend trip?"

         "Oh, you know, a couple weeks or so," he replied, running his fingers through my hair.

         "It sounds great, Carter. I could always use a break from County anyways."

         "What time do you get off today?"

         "I get off at 3."

         "Meet you at my place at 5, then?"

         "Sure, that works for me,"

         "Great!"

* * *

         As I walked out of the exam room, my hand automatically slipped to my coat pocket. There was nothing in it at the moment, but I kept thinking back to five months earlier, when there had been a ring in there. The ring that I had almost proposed to Abby with. And now, I was about to propose for real. I wondered if Abby had any idea this time around. Probably not, I thought to myself. The last time she said anything about it was that night we almost broke up. I shuddered to myself. I didn't want to think about that night ever again- I didn't ever want to think about losing Abby again.

         "Carter. Earth to Carter!" a voice shouted. I whipped around, almost running into Susan Lewis, one of my best friends in the ER.

         "Oh, sorry," I said.

         "It's okay, really," she laughed. "I just wanted to tell you that Weaver needs you up front. There's a trauma coming in, ETA 5 minutes."

         "Okay, thanks." Susan looked at me quizzically.

         "Are you okay?" she asked.

         "Me? Yeah, I'm fine. I'm great," I replied. She stared at me for a moment.

         "You're proposing again, aren't you?"

         "Well, yeah." Susan shook her head and grinned.

         "Abby's a great girl. Get it right this time, Carter," she said, walking off.


	2. Chapter 2

            It was five o'clock on the dot as I pulled up into the driveway of Carter's apartment building. I walked up to his door, grinning like a little girl all the way. Sometimes I felt like I ought to pinch myself, the way my life had been going lately. There hadn't been any new problems with my family, Maggie was doing great- and I had the best boyfriend a girl could ever ask for. When I think about all the times he could have left, all the times I tried to push him away, I- well, I know I'm incredibly lucky that he's still here. I rang his doorbell, and he answered right away.

            "Ready to go?" I asked.

            "You bet," he answered. "I'll be out in one second. I just have to get my- uh, my keys.

* * *

            "I just have to get my- uh, my keys," I heard myself say. Nice, John, I thought to myself. Let's forget the ring, since the whole point of this trip is that I'm going to propose. I walked quickly into my bedroom, and opened up the bottom drawer of my dresser. There, in the same place it had been for the past five months, was the ring my Gamma had given to me. "Give it, or don't, to whomever you choose," she had said. Well, Gamma, I'm choosing Abby. I love her, and I can't even begin to imagine being with anyone else. All I can do now is hope that she feels the same.

            "Okay, let's go," I said as I walked back to the door. Abby smiled up at me as I gave her a quick kiss, then put my arm around her and strode to my car.

* * *

            "Are you sure this car's gonna make it out to this cabin? You know, it doesn't exactly have the best track record for staying together," I teased Carter.

            "Are you trying to say my jeep's a piece of crap?" he replied.

            "Wait, now, I didn't say that. Don't you go twisting my words around!"

            "Yeah, yeah, I see how it is."

            "Whatever, Carter. As long as it gets us there and back, I'm good," I told him.

            "Back? Who said anything about back? It'll get us there, but, who knows, we may just get stuck there for a while." We both laughed, but secretly I thought that being stuck in a cabin with Carter for a while might not be so bad at all. 

            "At least this road trip, I get to be alone with you," he added. This road trip, I thought? What other road trip was there? Then I suddenly remembered- my mother, Oklahoma…and Rena and Luka, our respective then-significant others.

            "Oh, being in a car with Maggie for 20 hours wasn't your idea of fun, either?" I asked.

            "I don't know, it wasn't so bad. I mean, I did get to be with you for 20 hours too."

            "Shouldn't you have been more concerned with Rena at the time?"

            "Probably. I think she knew that too. So did Susan- both of those relationships ended because of you. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing," he added quickly.

            "I guess I really am a homewrecker, huh?" I teased.

            "Yeah, I guess so," he teased back.

* * *

            "I think we need some music on," Abby said.

            "What, I'm not interesting enough to keep your attention for a couple of hours?" I remarked. She laughed, and fiddled with the radio knob.

            "Ooh, I love this song," she squealed.

            "Oh, no," I mock groaned. "This doesn't mean you're going to start singing again, does it?" Of course, she promptly stuck her tongue out at me and turned the song up.

            "I'm falling even more in love with you, letting go of all I've held on to…" she sang. Suddenly I gasped.

            "What?" she asked. "Is my singing really that bad?"

            "No, no, it's just…don't you remember?"

            "Remember what?" she asked, looking at me quizzically.

            "We-we danced to this song. Remember, that benefit thing I drug you to a couple of years ago?"

            "Oh, yeah, now I remember." She smiled softly. "That was a really fun night, actually."

            "Especially with all the illegal tire popping," I kidded her. She grinned, then leaned over and gave me a big kiss.

            "What was that for?" I asked, pleasantly surprised.

            "Everything." She shook her head, then added, "I love you, Carter." Yeah, I thought to myself, this is definitely who I want to spend the rest of my life with.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Once again, ER and all of its characters are not mine, they are the property of NBC, Michael Crighton, and whoever else owns them.

Author's note: This chapter continues almost exactly after the last one, just continuing the story of Abby and Carter's weekend vacation. Chapter 3 is kind of short, but hopefully I made up for it with Chapter 4, which is rather long. Thanks to everyone who's read and reviewed so far, I appreciate any comments/ criticism of my work.

"Wow," I breathed as we walked into the cabin. "This place is gorgeous."

         "I'm glad you like it," responded Carter smoothly. I looked at him strangely for a moment.

         "It doesn't always look this way, does it?" I asked.

         "Well…" Carter grinned sheepishly, "I came up here a few weeks ago for an afternoon- that day you and Susan had your marathon shopping trip- and cleaned the place up. I didn't know how long it had been since anyone had used it, and I wanted to make sure it looked decent."

         "It looks great," I told him. I dumped my suitcase in the front hallway, and began wandering around the cabin, which was actually more like a palace than a cabin. It was the perfect place to spend a quiet weekend away from everything. I walked slowly into the master bedroom, taking in everything possible. As I glanced out the window, I gasped. We were up on a mountaintop, and from that window all you could see was beautiful rolling hills and forest. Suddenly, I realized that Carter had come up behind me.

         "That's my favorite spot in the entire world," he said, pointing to a little clearing in the forest.

         "It's beautiful," I replied.

         "When I was younger, my whole family used to come out here every summer. After a few days, everyone always started fighting with each other, so I'd escape to that spot to be alone. I always thought no one ever knew about it, but when I was older I realized that this bedroom overlooked it, so I'm sure my parents did."

         "Who knows? Maybe they didn't know. Parents aren't always as observant and all-knowing as they think they are. Maggie always thought she knew everything about my life, but she didn't, and she never will."

 I felt Carter's arms envelop me as he laid his head down on my shoulder.

         "I love you, Abby," he whispered.

* * *

         In that moment, I knew how I was going to propose. That had been the one detail that I just hadn't quite been able to figure out in this whole thing. The house, the trip, the ring- all of that was already in place. But how to propose- well, that was a different story. I had already screwed it up once, and I wasn't going to do it again. If I messed up this time…I shook my head. It wasn't going to happen, because now I knew that that clearing was perfect. And Abby would understand why it was perfect- actually, I think she already did. She understood everything about me. I couldn't have asked for someone better to fall in love with. Despite everything about her that seemed messed up on the outside, I knew that on the inside she was this troubled, beautiful woman dying to come out of her shell. Sometimes I wished that everyone else could see what I see in her, but it was moments like these that it was kind of nice having it all to myself.

         "Carter?" Abby said, breaking me out of my reverie.

         "Hmm?" I responded.

         "Are we gonna unpack anytime soon, or are we just gonna stand here?"

         I softly kissed her neck. "No," I whispered, "we're just gonna stand here forever."

         "Okay," she murmured. "Sounds good to me."


	4. Chapter 4

         "Hey, sleepyhead," I heard Carter say the next morning.

         "What time is it?" I asked groggily.

         "Almost 9:30."

         "And you're waking me up why?"

         "We've got stuff to do today, you know," he replied.

         "Oh really?" I asked, rolling over on top of him. "And what exactly would that stuff be?"

         "Well, for starters, I believe there's a lovely breakfast waiting for you in the kitchen."

         "Okay, okay, I'm up. Just let me get myself together enough to walk out there."

         "Or…" he said, rolling me over, "I could carry you out there."

         "You wouldn't…aah!" I screamed as he picked me up and walked out to the kitchen.

         "I wouldn't, huh?" he asked, grinning.

         I laughed, as we sat down to breakfast. It was great- eggs, pancakes, bacon, and orange juice. And everything tasted really good, surprisingly.

         "I didn't know you could cook, Carter," I told him.

         "Yeah, well, I learned when I was in college. I got sick of eating fast food all the time."

         "Aah, yes, the great mystery that is John Carter," I joked. As I finished my breakfast, I thought back over the past year. What a crazy ride it had been. If you had told me a year ago that I would be dating Carter, I probably would have laughed in your face. Then I would have gone to work and- and ended up getting stuck in the ER for two straight weeks with him. Even though most people would have been miserable spending two weeks in quarantine, looking back on it, it was actually kind of fun. I wonder how much of an impact that had on our relationship- I mean, most couples don't spend their first two weeks dating by living together in an ER. Actually, it was probably good for us- it let us know that we could tolerate each other 24/7. I guess that'll be a good thing to know if…well, if this relationship ever goes any farther.

         Somehow, I don't think I'll ever really forget Carter screaming, "I wanna marry you!" on the rooftop of County. At the time, I thought he was joking, and although I later realized he hadn't been, I'm not so sure now. He hasn't said anything about it since that day we almost broke up. To this day I'm still amazed that he came back. Those few moments when I thought I'd lost him forever were the hardest moments in my life. Up until then, I didn't think anything could be harder than growing up with Maggie, but I was wrong. Carter is the only person in my life who's ever tried to understand me, and the thought of losing him scared me to death. I'm not sure what I would have done if he hadn't come back.

         "Abby?" Carter snapped me out of my reminiscing.

         "Oh, sorry. I was just thinking about stuff," I said. He flashed one of his big goofy grins at me, and I smiled back. At that moment, all I could think about was that I hoped my ranting and raving that night didn't ruin any chance Carter and I might have of a future together- because that's the only future I could picture.

* * *

         "So, we've got the whole weekend to ourselves. What do you want to do?" I asked Abby, while we were sitting on the couch after breakfast.

         "You mean there's actually stuff to do out here in the middle of nowhere?" she asked incredulously.

         "Hey, we are not in the middle of nowhere," I retorted, my eyes flashing. "I don't think you appreciate…" I trailed off as I realized that she was cracking up laughing at me.

         "It's not nice to laugh at people," I mock pouted.

         "Yeah, well, I guess I missed that day in school," she said, grinning. "Seriously, though, this is your place. You're the one who knows what there is to do here. Why don't you give me the grand tour, or whatever?"

         "Sure, sounds good to me." Abby and I spent the next couple hours watching TV and parts of various movies. Then, at about 11:30, I "disappeared" into the kitchen and packed us a picnic lunch. After about fifteen minutes or so, she must have realized I was gone, because she wandered in, coming up behind me.

         "Hey, what are you doing?" she asked.

         "Making lunch."

         "Ooh, looks good," she remarked, peering into the basket.

         "I'm almost done," I replied. I went to the refrigerator, took out two Cokes, and tossed them into the picnic basket. "Okay, ready?" I asked.

         "Yeah, I'm ready. Where exactly are we going, again?"

         "You'll see," I said mischievously. She rolled her eyes at me, but followed me out the door.  About ten minutes later, we found ourselves sitting on a grassy hill overlooking the lake. When we were done with lunch, I flopped back on to the blanket, staring over at the calm water.

         "Trying to get a tan, Carter?" Abby grinned at me.

         "No, trying to decide if that water is actually warm, or if it's just tricking me into thinking it is."

         "You didn't even bring a bathing suit with you," she pointed out.

         "What, you mean there's not gonna be any skinny-dipping this time?" I asked.

         She laughed. "No. That," she said, lying down next to me, "was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity."

         "Well, then, I guess it was a good thing I took advantage of it, huh?" I said, pulling her on top of me. A little off balance, she took the opportunity to pull me over too, and before I knew it, we were rolling down the hill together like a couple of little kids.

         She shrieked with laughter. "I'm gonna kill you, Carter!" she screamed.

         "Hey, this wasn't my fault. You're the one that pulled me over!" I screamed back. Finally, we made it to the bottom of the hill, screaming and laughing our asses off. After we both calmed down, we just lay there for a few minutes, silent.

         "This is really nice," Abby said.

         "So's this," I said, leaning over and giving her a big kiss.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own ER or any of its characters. They are the property of NBC, Michael Crighton, etc.

Author's Note: This chapter is a little more serious than the other ones have been so far, but I tried not to make it depressing, just dramatic. Plus, there is somewhat of an interesting twist!

"It's Saturday night, and there is absolutely nothing on TV," I pouted, clicking the television set off with the remote. Carter kissed my neck softly as we laid there on the couch, sending chills down my spine.

         "And I suppose just laying here with me without a movie on would be just horrible," he whispered teasingly.

         "Yep. I'd never be able to take that. Several hours just laying here with my boyfriend- wow, that would be almost unbearable," I said sarcastically.

         "Well, personally," Carter began, "I think it's kind of nice being up here with just the two of us. It's so much quieter than how I remember it."

         "Really?" I asked, snuggling up closer to him. "What was it like, coming down here as a kid?" I had never really had any trips or vacations as a child that hadn't been somehow ruined by Maggie. Unintentionally ruined, usually, but ruined nonetheless. I wished I could "fondly remember" childhood trips like that. But, at the very least, I wanted to hear about Carter's experiences- maybe then I'd at least have some memories by association. And, I thought to myself suddenly, Carter's memories were special to me, because…well, just because it's Carter, and I hoped that someday a lot of his memories would have me in them too.

         "Well," he said suddenly, "Every summer, usually in mid to late June, after school got out, the whole family would come down here. And I do mean the whole family- Gamma, my mom and dad, and every other Carter within a 50-mile radius. Once we got down here, all of us kids would rush into the house and try to get what we thought were the 'best' bedrooms. Of course, within a few minutes, the adults would come in, and even if we had all settled on rooms, they'd reassign them anyway. There were so many of us that we all had to share a room with at least one other person…what?" he asked as I started laughing.

         "Reassign," I said. "You sound like you were at boot camp or something."

         "Oh, thanks, Abby. That makes me feel so good about my summers here."

         "No, it sounds fun. More fun than any of my childhood summer experiences," I replied.

         "Fine," he mock sighed. "After we unpacked- Gamma always made us do that first- the adults would kick us out of the house, and we'd go play outside. The guys would all play 'Indians and Cowboys' or something like that, and the girls would…I don't know, hold their secret 'Girls Club' meetings or whatever."

         "Hey, I take offense to that," I said.

         "Yeah, whatever," he replied back, then added, "You know, it was actually kind of nice having all those kids here. Crazy, but nice."

         I smiled. "Yeah, this does seem like a really nice place to bring kids to," I said, leaning my head on his shoulder.

         "Our kids?" he asked. I lifted my head up off his shoulder quickly, turning around to look at him. "Not that we're necessarily going to have kids or anything, it was just a thought…" he trailed off. It was now or never, I told myself.

* * *

         "Carter, there's something I have to tell you," Abby said soberly. Oh my gosh, I thought to myself. I've really blown it now. She's going to break up with me, or something like that.

         "When I was married to Richard, I was never really happy. And when it was getting closer to the end of our marriage, I knew I didn't want to have kids with him. So, when I found out I was pregnant, I…I had an abortion." I must have had a really shocked look on my face, because she continued on quickly, "Not that I'd want to have one if I was pregnant now. I just…well, before we started talking about having kids, I thought you should know. Actually, I probably should have told you sooner, it's just that…"

         "Abby," I said, taking her hands in mine, "I love you. That's never going to change- you know that, right?"

         "I guess so," she said shakily. "It's just that this is a really big thing, you know, and I'm just never sure how you, or anyone I might tell, will react."

         "Nothing you can tell me will ever make me not want to be with you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone else, and I don't ever want to lose you," I told her emphatically.

         "I know that now. It just took me awhile to realize it," she said back.

         "So, who have you told, other than me?" I asked curiously.

         "Just Maggie and Susan," she replied.

         "Susan knows?"

         "Of course. Girlfriends tell each other everything, haven't you learned that yet?"

         "Unfortunately, no," I replied. "And it probably would have saved me a lot of trouble in high school and college." At that moment, I reached over and kissed Abby passionately.

         "What was that for?" she asked, surprised.

         "Everything," I responded. "C'mon, let's go to bed," I said softly, pulling Abby up from the couch. "It's been a long day, and we've still got tomorrow to look forward to." She smiled genuinely at me, and followed me into the bedroom. It was the perfect end to a perfect day.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I do not own ER or any of its characters. They are the property of NBC, Michael Crighton, etc.

Author's note: These next two chapters are leading up to the proposal, which seems to be going exactly as Carter planned- or is it? Thanks to everyone who's already reviewed, and please read and review these chapters, and let me know where you think the story could go from here. All comments/ suggestions are greatly appreciated!

I lay there silently in bed Saturday night, Carter's arm around me, trying to fall asleep. For the first time in a really long time, I felt completely safe and secure with someone. Telling Carter about my abortion was something I'd been worried about for a really long time, and now that I'd told him, it was like a big weight had been lifted off of me. I couldn't believe how easily he'd accepted it- I mean, Carter's a great guy and all, but he tends to…disapprove of stuff like that, and even if he doesn't stop liking, or loving you, it's like his disapproval is always there, in your relationship. I guess this is a good sign- either he really doesn't think it's that big of a deal, or he's "changing and growing" too.

And I really do want to have kids. I want to have kids with him. I'm still nervous about it- besides all the normal pre-mom fears, I worry about my kids having bi-polar disease, or that Carter and I might both pass on our "addictive personalities", so to speak. I'd hate for my kids to go through either of those things. But I also hated growing up with a mother who was never really there, and I know I won't do that to my kids, regardless of what happens. But if we do have kids, I know Carter and I will raise them really well. All I can do is hope that he knows that too.

* * *

         Abby thinks I'm asleep, but I'm not. I can't stop thinking about what she told me earlier. She had an abortion. My girlfriend, the woman I love more than anything in the entire world, had an abortion. And strangely enough, it doesn't bother me as much as I would have thought it would. The only thing that really bothers me is that she didn't tell me until now. It's not like I'm some guy she just met- we were best friends for two years before we even began dating. I'm sure there were plenty of opportunities for her to tell me. I suppose it's not like I really have a whole lot of room to talk about missing opportunities, since I'm the one who had a huge crush on Abby for two years before I finally got the courage to kiss her. I'll never forget her saying "Tell me we're gonna be okay," as her warm brown eyes pleaded with me to say yes. I just knew that in that moment, if I didn't go for it, nothing would ever happen between us, and I wouldn't have been able to live with myself if that had happened.

         Maybe that's what Abby was thinking when she told me tonight. I'm sure she realized at some point in time that she'd have to tell me eventually, and maybe it just hit her tonight that if she didn't tell me now, she'd never be able to, and then our relationship would never go any further. Actually, I kind of hope that's what she was thinking, because that would mean she still thinks we could have a future together. I'm still nervous about it, as well as about the idea of us having kids, but I know that together we would make really good parents. All I can do is hope that she knows that too.

* * *

         "Mmm," I muttered, trying somewhat unsuccessfully to open my eyes. "Morning, Carter."

         "Already?" he groaned as he rolled over.

         "Yeah, this is our last day here, then it's back to work at County," I replied.

         "Noooo!" he said, pulling me on top of him. "I'm not letting you leave. We're just gonna stay here for good."

         "I wish," I answered, then added, "Hey, thanks for not freaking out on me last night. I know I kinda sprung that on you, and I know I should have told you sooner…"

         "Sssh," he whispered, putting his finger on my lips. "It's okay, I understand."

         "And you're okay with it?" I asked.

         "Of course," he responded quickly. But I knew he meant it.

         "Carter-," he looked up, "I really did mean what I said."

         "About what?"

         "I wouldn't have one if I was pregnant with your kid."

* * *

         I smiled at Abby, then pulled her up out of bed.

         "C'mon, let's go eat. I'm starving," I said.

         "What, do you have some big plans for us today?" she asked.

         "Maybe," I responded mysteriously. As I walked out to the kitchen I smiled to myself. Yeah, I'm pretty sure she still thinks we have a future together. Which is a very good thing, because I know we do. Hopefully, we'll both be sure of it by tonight- as long as I play my cards right. This is my one last chance to make sure my future- our future- is exactly the way I have it planned.


	7. Chapter 7

"What do you want me to do, put on a blindfold or something? I'm not gonna look, I promise!" I yelled at Carter, ten feet behind him.

         "I believe you. Just keep your eyes shut until I tell you to open them! This won't be any fun if it's not a surprise," he yelled back. I rolled my eyes underneath my hands, but I stayed put. I knew Carter had something special planned for us today, and I didn't want to ruin it. Actually, I think he's had it planned for longer than today. He's been acting kind of mysterious all weekend- I keep wondering if there's some kind of hidden meaning behind this whole trip. But, if there is, I have no idea what, so I guess I'll just have to enjoy it as it comes.

         "Okay, I'm ready!" I turned around and opened my eyes.

         "Oh my gosh!" I gasped as I ran up to him. "This is gorgeous!" All at once I found myself surrounded by the most beautiful scenery in the entire world. On the ground was an elegant tablecloth, spread out like a picnic blanket. Suddenly I realized something.

         "This is the place you showed me from the window, isn't it?" I asked.

         "Yeah, it is," he said softly.

         "You're pretty good at this, you know," I told him.

         "At what?"

         "At this." I gestured all around me. "The picnic, the food, the place…the guy," I paused, "it's all perfect."

         "It should be. You deserve it," he replied. We both sat there for a moment, just taking it all in.

         "So, how many other girls have you done this with?" I asked teasingly.

         "Oh, yeah, I've brought a ton of girls up here before," he said sarcastically. "Actually, you're the first."

         "Really?"

         "Well, yeah. I mean, we weren't actually allowed to bring girls up here when we were kids, but we all did anyway. It's just that this was my 'special place' and I never really wanted to share it with anyone…except you." He smiled warmly at me, and I just looked at him for a second.

         "Carter, is there some particular reason you're doing all this?"

* * *

         This was it. This was the big moment- the whole reason I'd planned this trip. I could not mess this up. What if I messed this up? Okay, Carter, calm down, and take a deep breath, I told myself. Everything's going to be okay.

         "Well, yeah, just a little reason. Okay, maybe a big one." I sat there for a few moments, trying to collect my thoughts.

         "So, are you gonna tell me what the reason is, or am I gonna have to guess?" Abby asked jokingly. Don't miss your opportunity, Carter.

         "Abby," I began slowly, "I've been in love with you since the day I met you. I didn't realize it then, but I was. For two years, I waited and waited for the right moment to tell you that I wanted to be with you. That day, something inside me told me that if I didn't go for it then, I would never have gotten to be with you, and if that had happened, I don't know what I would have done. Every day that I get to spend with you, every time I'm near you, all I want to do is tell you that I love you, and how lucky I am to have you as my girlfriend."

         "I'm lucky to have you too, Carter," she replied warmly.

         "Wait, let me finish," I said, taking her hands in mine. "What I'm trying to say is, I've been getting that feeling again, that 'I need to go for it' feeling. Abby, I have never wanted to be with someone as much as I want to be with you. I cannot imagine ever being without you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you." I paused, then took a small box out of my pocket. "Abby, will you marry me?"

         "Oh my gosh," she gasped. "Carter, I…" She looked up into my eyes, pleading with her to say yes the same way I'd said yes to her that day over a year ago. "Yes. Yes, I'll marry you!" She threw her arms around me, and we kissed for what seemed like forever. Then, all of a sudden, this loud beeping sound started up.

         "I think that's me," Abby said.

         "Actually, it's me too," I replied curiously. "It's County." Abby got out her cell phone and quickly called them. After a few harried moments of conversation, she hung up and looked at me soberly.

         "That was Weaver. She said we need to get to the ER- now."__


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: Once again, I don't own ER or any of the characters. They are the property of Michael Crighton and NBC.

Author's note: Hopefully this next chapter will help to explain the cliffhanger from last chapter. Also, I'd like to note that although I know Weaver is no longer technically Chief of Emergency Medicine, I'm just going to pretend that somehow she is again for this fanfic, because it fits better to have her be it than Romano, at least for my purposes.

As soon as I got off the phone, Carter and I ran as quickly as we could back to the cabin. All of our stuff was already packed up, since we were going to leave that evening anyway.

"Hey, sorry we didn't get to have that picnic," I said as we were running out the door.

"Don't worry about it. We'll have it some other time," he said. He sounded kind of disappointed though- I think it meant a lot more to him than he was going to let on. He had a right to be too- it would have been a really nice picnic. Of course, now I will always have the memories of being called off to the ER right after I got engaged. Wow- I was engaged. I paused for a moment.

"Abby?" Carter asked. "Are you okay?"

"What? Oh yeah, I'm fine."

"Well, we better get going then," he said, throwing the last of our bags into the back of the Jeep.

"Yeah, wouldn't want to keep Weaver waiting," I replied sarcastically. With that, we both got into the car and began speeding down the highway, wondering why on earth our vacation was being cut short. I couldn't remember the last time people were called to the ER for no apparent reason. Wait- yes I could. It was over three years ago, and it was only because Carter and Lucy had both been attacked by a patient and seriously injured. That was a once-in-a-lifetime thing, though, wasn't it? 

As I was wringing my hands together, I suddenly noticed something. There was no ring on my left ring finger. I know Carter has a ring, because I saw it after the…well, we won't go there right now. Oh well, I thought, shrugging my shoulders. I know that I'm Carter's fiancée, and that's all that matters.

* * *

I sped down the highway as fast as I could, but my mind was somewhere else entirely. I couldn't for the life of me figure out why Weaver had paged both Abby and I. We'd both told her that we were going to be gone over the weekend, and I think Abby had even told her that we were going away together- though she probably could have figured that out on her own. The only time I could think of when we would have needed all of our doctors was right after County had been closed for two weeks, and we had that insane amount of patients, but I couldn't believe that had happened again.

"Abby," I said, trying to get my mind off all of this.

"Yeah?" she asked.

"If Weaver, or anyone else at County, pages or calls us on our wedding day, we're not going, okay?"

"Absolutely not. Trust me, no sane girl would let anything like that ruin her wedding."

"Oh really? And what would you let ruin your wedding?

"We wouldn't let anything intentionally ruin it, stupid, but if the groom doesn't show up, we're kind of screwed."

I turned my head and looked at her seriously. "Right, like I'd not show up for our wedding," I said as we pulled into the city. While I stopped at a red light, I reached into my pocket to find my County parking ticket- and my hand brushed up against the ring box. In the hurry to get out of there, I hadn't had a chance to give Abby the ring. Great, I thought, now she's really gonna think I'm stupid. I glanced over at her, but I couldn't tell whether she had noticed yet or not. Just then, the light turned green and we rounded the corner to Cook County General.

* * *

"Hey, you guys!" I heard Susan's voice shout over the rain that had just started to fall. "How was your weekend away?"

"Well, it could have been better, seeing as how it was kind of cut short," I replied.

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I tried to hold Weaver off from calling you guys as long as I could- I didn't want to interrupt anything."

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"If she had called a few minutes earlier, I would still be unofficially 'not taken'." Susan looked at me strangely for a moment, then got a huge grin on her face.

"Oh my gosh, you're engaged!" she screamed, throwing her arms around me in a big hug. "I'm so excited!" After she broke away, I stared at her for a second.

"You knew, didn't you?" I asked.

"Maybe," she replied mysteriously. 

"I'm gonna kill you!" I shrieked. "I can't believe you didn't tell me!"

"C'mon, let's go inside," Susan said, ignoring my outburst, "and you can get all the details from Weaver, so you can't kill the messenger."

* * *

         I began to follow Susan and Abby inside, but stopped short the second I got inside the doors. The ER was completely overwhelmed with patients- it looked like a tornado had just hit.

         "Yeah, it's been fairly chaotic around here for the past couple hours. We've pretty much been able to handle it, but…" Susan trailed off.

         "But what?" I asked.

         "Oh, look, there's Dr. Weaver, and I have a patient waiting in Curtain 3. I believe this is my cue to go," she said.

         "For the love of God, would someone please tell us why we're here?" Abby asked, sounding very exasperated.

         "There was a plane crash on the runway at O'Hare Airport. The plane wasn't very high off the ground when it crashed, so there are a lot of survivors, but most of them are critical. The other hospitals around here are just as overloaded as we are, so we're going to need all the help we can get. Plus," she paused, letting that sink in.

         "Plus what?" I asked nervously.

         "We're fairly sure Dr. Kovac was on that plane."

         "Oh my gosh," I heard Abby say from behind me. When I turned around, she looked as pale as a ghost.


	9. Chapter 9

  
Disclaimer: I don't own ER or any of its characters. They are the property of Michael Crighton, NBC, etc.

Author's note: Okay, I promise, no more big cliffhangers at the end of chapters! These next two chapters will hopefully explain the significance of the last one, as well as "answer" it, so to speak. P.S. I wrote the first half of this chapter before "Foreign Affairs" aired, which is why Luka went to Croatia and not the Congo. Any resemblance to that storyline is completely coincidental.

Suddenly I felt like I'd been hit with a ton of bricks. Why was Luka coming back?

         "I-I have to go get something. I'll be right back out, Carter," I said as I quickly rushed into the lounge. I almost collapsed into the chair as I heard the door slam shut behind me. Luckily for me, there was no one in there, because I really wasn't in the mood to answer questions right now. I didn't even know most of the answers myself. I sat there silently for a minute, my head buried in my hands, trying to collect my thoughts. Then I heard the door swish open.

         "Abby?" I heard Susan's voice ask gently. "Abby, are you okay?" She sat down next to me, and I looked up at her slowly.

         "I don't know," I said. "I have absolutely no idea what to think right now." Susan looked at me questioningly, and I sighed. "I suppose I should explain all this to you, shouldn't I?"

         "Well, since I have no idea what's going on, that might be nice," she replied.

         "The day before Luka left, he and I had gone out for coffee," I paused as Susan looked at me warningly. "Oh, no, it wasn't like that- he said he just wanted to talk before he flew halfway across the world, since he didn't know when he'd be back. Carter knew what I was doing." I stopped short, not exactly sure how to explain what had happened next.

         "So, what's the problem?" Susan probed curiously.

         "He's still in love with me," I answered quickly. She stared at me in complete shock.

         "What?"

         "He said he's still in love with me. He also said that he knew I was with Carter, and he didn't expect me to do or say anything about it. Then he got up and left. The next day he got on a plane and flew to Croatia, and I haven't seen him since."

         "That's it? That's all he said?"

         "Well, not exactly. He wrote me this letter too." I got up and went to my locker. I pulled out a folded piece of paper, hidden beneath my scrubs and assorted other junk. "Here," I said, handing the letter to Susan. "Go ahead, read it." As I saw her eyes begin to scan the letter, mine did too, reading the last thing I'd heard from him in almost two months. I'd thought we were friends, but maybe I was really naïve, thinking that I could be friends with my ex, like everyone did in high school. Then, you had to stay friends; otherwise the entire school would have hated each other, with all the break-ups and make-ups that occurred in those four years. I guess it wasn't that way in the real world, though. The last sentence he had written was, "I don't know how long I'm going to stay in Zagreb, but I don't think I'll be coming back any time soon, unless you give me a reason to." As soon as Susan finished reading it, she looked up at me.

         "Abby, are you sure you should be agreeing to marry Carter with all this going on?"

         "I don't know," I replied. "But I need to talk to Luka first."

* * *

         "John, nice to see you back," said Dr. Weaver.

         "Well, I wish I could say the same about being back," I replied.

         "So you had a good time with Abby this weekend?"

         "Yeah, it was nice," I replied happily.

         "Nice?" Chuny, one of our nurses, butted in. "Rumor is you two got engaged."

         "Can't anyone ever have anything to themselves around here?" I asked, laughing.

         "Nope," she replied. "Oh, and here," she added, handing me several charts, "there's a bad headache in Exam 4, a sore throat and a lingering cold in Curtain 2, and a possible aspirin OD in Exam 5."

         "Great," I said sarcastically.

         "You're welcome," she said teasingly. "Oh, and congratulations."

         "Why did I become an ER doctor again?" I asked Dr. Weaver, shaking my head. She laughed and shooed me away with her crutch.

         "Because you're good at it. Now go, we need all the help we can get today." I turned around, but stopped at the sound of Weaver's voice.

         "Oh, and John-," I turned my head back around. "Congratulations. You two'll be great together."

         "Thanks," I replied sincerely. I walked over to Exam 5 first.

         "So, Mrs. Johnson, what seems to be the problem today?" I asked.

         "My stomach hurts awful bad, and I don't feel very good in general. I've had a constant headache for the past few days."

         "Did you take anything, or eat anything, that might have caused this?"

         "Well, I took aspirin earlier for my headache," she said reluctantly.

         "How much aspirin, Mrs. Johnson?" I asked.

         "I don't really remember…" she drifted off.

         "Hey Carter, do you have a minute?" Susan asked, poking her head in the door.

         "Yeah, just a second," I responded. I told Chuny what tests to order, and walked out with Susan.

         "Look, I probably shouldn't be saying anything at all, so I'll let Abby do most of the talking, but you really, really need to talk to her soon."

         "What? Why?" I asked, confused.

         "I can't tell you anything else, Abby would kill me. As it is, I'll probably already be in trouble, but I don't want to see anything get messed up for you two. You've already had too much confusion and drama in your relationship," she said hurriedly. "I gotta go. Talk to her, Carter." I stood there in stunned silence. What could be so important that I had to talk to Abby right away, but that Susan couldn't tell me about? I stood there for a moment, then rushed off to find Abby. I wasn't about to let anything ruin our future together.


	10. Chapter 10

         "Hey, when are the plane crash victims coming in?" I asked.

         "Umm…now," said Dr. Corday. "Apparently I'm the only surgeon who could get down here on short notice, so I'm hoping it isn't too bad."

         "Yeah, me too," I agreed. "I wasn't actually counting on coming in until tomorrow, and I'm not really in the mood for a mass trauma." Especially not if one of them is Luka, I thought.

         "Oh, that's right, you and Carter went off together over the weekend. So, is the hospital rumor true?"

         I laughed. "If the hospital rumor is that we're engaged, then yeah."

         "Well, congratulations. I'm very happy for you two."

         "Thanks," I replied. "So, how did you know that anyway? I only told one person."

         "You should know by now that nothing is ever really a secret at County," she said.

         "You're one to talk," I retorted. "How long did you and Dr. Romano go out before you told anyone?"

         "It was only about a month and a half!" she protested. We both looked at each other for a moment, then busted up laughing. "Maybe we should both learn something here," she added.

         "Yeah, you're probably right," I answered. "Well, here they come." We both walked quickly out to the ambulance bay, where several traumas were pulling up at once, all from the plane crash. I listened to the paramedics' brief on my patient, but afterwards, I realized I had no idea what they had said. My mind was still reeling with the thought of seeing and talking to Luka for the first time since…well, since reading that letter of his. It shouldn't be this hard- I love John, and I'm going to marry him- but it is. I have no idea what either of us will say or do, and I'm really scared. I wish Carter could be there- I've gotten used to him always being there- but this is something I'm going to have to do alone.

         We rushed into Trauma 1, but as soon as we were done, I walked slowly through the doors to Trauma 2. It was completely free of doctors and nurses, except for Luka, who was lying on the bed.

         "Abby?" he asked, not trying to hide the surprise in his voice.

         "What are you doing here, Luka?"

* * *

         I stopped short outside the doors of Trauma 2. I thought Dr. Kovac was in there by himself, but then I heard Abby's voice. I peered in the windows, only to see her leaning over him, holding his hand. I stepped back quickly, not wanting her to see me spying on her.

         "I couldn't stay over there without you," I heard Luka say.

         "Luka, what are you talking about? I didn't give you any reason to come back," Abby said. What was she talking about, I wondered.

         "I know, I just couldn't be there alone any more."

         "Luka, you can't do this. I can't be with you. I'm with Carter. I love him. I'm marrying him." I barely heard Abby's words. All I saw was Luka lifting Abby's hand up and looking at it.

         "No ring," he said sarcastically. Shit! I cursed myself. Why hadn't I just given her the ring really quick? Then I heard Luka's voice again. "Abby, I love you," he said softly.

         "Luka, I-," Abby began, but I couldn't stay and listen to any more. I ran down the hall blindly, my head in my hands. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes when someone stopped me. I looked up and saw Susan standing there, her eyes full of compassion.

         "She's in there with him," I said. 

         "Okay, all confidences are off. Get in here," she said, pulling me into the lounge.

         "He said he loved her!" I screamed. "I took her out, I proposed-,"

         "And she said yes!" Susan interrupted me. "She said yes because she loves you, and she wants to spend the rest of her life with you. Look, don't ever tell her I told you this, but she knew he loved her before he left. He wrote her a letter and told her. She didn't follow him to Croatia, or beg him to stay here- she stayed with you. Did you here her say she loved him back?"

         "No," I admitted sheepishly. "But I didn't stick around very long after he said it," I added.

         "I'm sure she didn't- because she doesn't love him. But you still need to talk to her. Come to think of it, it might not be a bad idea to talk to Luka, either." I must have had a puzzled look on my face, because she added, "Abby and I both went out with you, but yet we managed to become best friends. You and Luka hate each other."

         "Okay, I get the point. I'm going, I'm going," I said as she waved me out of the lounge.

         "Susan," I added, "thanks. For everything." 


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I do not own ER or any of its characters. They belong to Michael Crighton, NBC, etc.

Author's note: I know it's been a long time since I've last written, but I've been really busy with finals and all at the end of the year. So, now that school's finally out, I'm going to finish this story. This chapter is the first of the "two part finale" to this fanfic.

         "Abby, I love you," I heard Luka say softly. No, no, no, I thought to myself, this cannot be happening. After all Carter and I have been through, I refuse to let this happen.

         "Luka, I can't do this anymore," I heard myself say firmly.

         "Can't do what?" 

         "This. All of these games we play, these awkward love triangle, 'who's Abby going to pick', lets fawn over Abby but not admit we like her games- I can't take it anymore. I've picked, I've made my decision. I love John, Luka. I like you, and I would love to be friends with you, but not if it's going to be like this for the rest of our lives."

         Both of us sat there silently for a few moments, not knowing quite what to say after my little outburst. Finally Luka looked down at the ground, then back up at me, and said, "I know."

         "What?" I asked somewhat annoyed "You know what?"

         "I know we can't keep playing these games. I also knew that if I stayed in Croatia, I would just be running from this, and from you, for the rest of my life, and I didn't want to do that. I didn't want to 'fawn over you and not admit it'. I didn't really expect you to be with me; I just needed to tell you this in person."

         "Okay," I said calmly, taking a deep breath. "I can deal with that."

         "So, what are we going to do now?"

         "Right now, I'm going to go find Carter," I said. Luka started to say something, but I put up my hand to stop him. "I know that's not what you meant, but that's exactly what I need to do right now." I walked out of the room and down the hall to the lounge. Suddenly, I saw Susan and Carter standing outside the door, talking.

         "Hey," I said gently.

         "Hey," replied Carter.

         "Okay, how about you two go in there, and I'll leave you alone," put in Susan.

         "But what about the traumas?" asked Carter.

         "I think we can manage without you guys for a few minutes. Now go," she said, pushing me into the lounge.

* * *

         As I slowly sat down in one of the not-very-comfortable chairs in the lounge, I looked closely at Abby. She had changed so much since the first time I met her, almost 3 & ½ years ago, but I was still just as in love with her as I had been that day.

         "So, you know, right?" asked Abby.

"Yeah, Susan told me," I said.

"Look, I should have told you about what happened, and I'm sorry, but we were doing really well then, and I didn't want to mess things up. But, I guess it's a little late for that now," Abby said.

         "No, it's not too late. I shouldn't have freaked out the way I did," I responded.

         "Wait- when did you freak out?"

         "Umm, about five minutes ago, when I saw you in there with Luka," I muttered sheepishly, and Abby grinned at me in that way she does.

         "Are you laughing at me?"

         "No, I would never do that," she replied teasingly. I took her hand in mine, and we both just sat there for a moment. "Why does it have to be so hard?" she asked suddenly.

         "What?"

         "Us. Being together. We never really had that 'honeymoon period' where everything is just great and happy. We've always had so much drama in our relationship."

         "I don't know. I don't know why it was always so hard for us. I used to think that that meant I, or we, were doing something wrong."

         "And now?" she asked, looking closely at me. I paused for a moment, gathering my thoughts.

         "The fact that we're still together, after all we've been through- I think it means we're doing something right. And it's going to be right for the rest of our lives."


	12. Chapter 12

Author's note: Well, here we finally are- the very last chapter of this fanfic. It's been a long time coming, and I'm kind of going to miss writing this every so often. Anyway, a big thanks to Katie, Melissa, and Justine for constantly reading and critiquing my work- I couldn't have done it without you guys! So, I hope you've enjoyed reading my story, and I hope you will find this conclusion just as enjoyable!

         "John, Abby- there's another plane crash trauma coming in. We need both of you right now!" Jing-Mei said as she stuck her head in the door. We both stared at her for a minute.

         "Oh, I'm sorry. Was I interrupting something?" she added.

         "No, we were just finishing up something…right, Abby?" Carter asked uncertainly.

         "Yeah, we're done," I said, squeezing his hand and giving him a knowing smile

         "Wedding plans?" Jing-Mei asked playfully.

         "No, not quite yet," I responded.

         "Does the whole hospital know?" Carter asked, acting astonished.

         "Well…yeah, pretty much. Oh, and congratulations! Now let's get out there, or Weaver'll have our asses." As I walked through the chaotic mess that was then the ER, Carter still holding very tightly onto my hand, it was an extremely familiar site. But at the same time, it was different. I suddenly realized that for the first time since I had been a med student here, over three years ago, my life was relatively drama-free. Both Maggie and Eric were settled, I wasn't smoking or drinking anymore, and most importantly, I was happily engaged to the person I was madly in love with. 

         "Abby, Carter, over here," I heard Dr. Corday call as we walked out into the ambulance bay. We hurried over to the ambulance she was standing at. "You two take this one, and I'll get the next one." She winked at me and added, "Wouldn't want to separate the two lovebirds." Carter rolled his eyes and grinned at me.

         "Thanks, Elizabeth!" he yelled somewhat sarcastically over his shoulder.

         "You're welcome, Carter!" she responded teasingly. He shook his head and smiled, giving my hand one last squeeze before dropping it and walking inside with the gurney.

         "Male, 42 years old, multiple lacerations to the right side…"

         Several hours later, I collapsed into a chair in the finally almost-empty waiting room. "Hey, I'm going down to the cafeteria to get some food. You want something?" Carter asked.

         "Sure, just get me a sandwich." As I watched him walk off, I saw Susan appear from Triage.

         "Sooo…you two are okay, right?" she asked worriedly.

         "Yeah, we're good," I responded confidently.

         "Good, cause I just happened to come upon this bridal magazine." She looked at me, grinning.

         "Oh really? You just happened to come upon it?" I said sarcastically. "Well, I guess there's no harm in looking at it…"

* * *

         I walked slowly back from the cafeteria, exhausted from the day's events, both physically and mentally. Abby was right- it never had been easy for the two of us to be together. Between old flings, family, drugs, and both of our tempers, we have had more almost-breakups than any couple I've ever known. But whether she knows it or not, I've always been in love with her, and I know that I always will be. Somehow, despite every obstacle known to man, something has kept the two of us coming back to each other. As I got back into the ER, I abruptly stopped. There, sitting inside Exam room 4, was Luka. We'd never been friends, as Susan so un-tactfully pointed out to me earlier, but something drew me into that room.

         "Carter? What are you doing here?" Luka asked, obviously surprised to see me in there.

         "How are you doing?" I asked, trying to ease myself into what I really wanted to say.

         "Much better. Just out of curiosity, is there some particular reason you're in here?" So much for easing myself into it, I thought.

         "Look, I was talking to Susan earlier, and she pointed out something that made a lot of sense. She said something along the lines of, 'Abby and I both went out with you, and we're best friends, but you and Luka hate each other.' "

         "I never hated you…" he trailed off. "Okay, she's got a point."

         "So, I guess my point is, I don't think Abby wants to play messenger between us for the rest of her life, regardless of…of who ends up with who, and I don't think it would kill us to at least attempt to be friends."

         "For Abby," Luka said.

         "For Abby," I agreed. We both looked at each other closely for a moment.

         "Okay," he said finally. I breathed a sigh of relief. That conversation could have gone a number of different ways, and I was extremely glad it went the way it did.

         "So, uh, I'll see you later," I said, walking out the door.

         "Hey, you made it back," Abby said cheerfully as I made my way into the waiting area.

         "Yep, here's your sandwich…what is that?" I cried.

         "It's a bridal magazine; haven't you ever seen one before, Carter?" Susan teased.

         "Haha, very funny. I know what it is- why do you have it?"

         "You're the one that's engaged," she pointed out.

         "So, do you think red or purple for the bridesmaids dresses?" asked Abby. I must have had an exasperated look on my face, because she added, "Relax, Carter, we're just looking. I'm not going to plan our whole wedding in one night, I promise." I sat back and watched as Abby and Susan continued to 'just look' at wedding stuff. It was one of those rare moments when Abby looked so unreservedly happy; when she looked so beautiful. Maybe, I thought, we were finally going to get our "honeymoon period". Maybe it would be for the rest of our lives.


End file.
